Personally, I hate all these articles that waste time
telling me that my major is one of the “10 worst Majors for Finding Jobs” or
what have you. Unlike a lot of people, I suppose, I didn’t go to college and
choose a major thinking, “Hmm, what would give me the best, highest-pay job?” I
went to college thinking, “I’m going to major in what I love.”
Unfortunately, not all kids get to do that. I don’t know how
many friends I made who said, “Yeah, I hate Biology but my parents said I had
to be a doctor.” I have a truly gifted friend who can draw amazing pieces and
write to match! Her father wants her to be a Lawyer and only agreed to let her
major in English because she could apply to Law school after (this was after
trying the Pre-Med track for a little while because her Dad wanted her to be a
doctor).
To me, this is tragic, but I can’t speak for parents out
there because I’m not one. You’re telling your kids this stuff out of fear—fear
that they can’t succeed with a certain degree, fear that they won’t make enough
money to survive in this world, and you want that. You know, I can’t blame you
for those fears, and maybe your kid ends up liking what they do, finding a
passion for it…but sometimes, kids just end up with a lot of resentment and
self-hatred. Don’t let that happen to your kids.
You can encourage both creative outlets and your wish to see
them have a good day job.
Okay, I am finished ranting, lol.
What do you guys think? Parents, how do you balance letting your kids explore their creativity and nudging them to get degrees they can 'do something with'?
I believe in following your passions! My husband fell into the same trap, his dad wanted him to do accounting so he did and now he hates and he's not sure where to go from here. If you have a passion go for it, because that drive will lead to success!
ReplyDeleteOh man, I'm sorry your husband is having such a difficult time with his career. They make up 40 hours (sometimes more) of your week and should definitely be enjoyed. I hope he finds something he's passionate about!
DeleteSpeaking from the parent perspective...college is expensive and you want your kids to be able to afford to eat and not come back to live in the basement. But the trick is to find something that meets both needs. Just pushing for the sake of an income is not wise, life enjoyment has to be considered.
ReplyDeleteVery true, college is expensive so I understand that! I agree--finding something that meets both needs is a great thing! I just spoke with my friend whose father decided she could be an English Major in order to go to Law School, and she's actually super excited about the whole experience! She's pursing her writing and drawing on the side and doing really well, too!
DeleteI don't think parents have the right to choose their kids' career for them. They should try their hardest to explain all possible options to their kids instead of the big two everyone pushes for (doctor/lawyer).
ReplyDeleteFor example, you could go to a culinary institute to become a chef or baker, which is something I only realized when it was too late to do so since my parents never told me. I would have been happy as a baker, and they make enough money, but it will never be because I was only told, "You should be a doctor," growing up. Something which not all people can do, and I declined to pursue, ending up not going to college at all as an alternative.
Oh man, Laura, that's tough! I"m sorry. When I was little, all I wanted to be was a doctor or a nurse because my parents said they made the most money, then, at some point, I grew out of that, LOL. They were still happy that I wanted to be a writer! Despite not going to college, you are following your passion for writing, which is a beautiful thing!
DeleteI want my kids to be happy when the time comes I will try to be ther for them to achieve that goal.
ReplyDeleteThat's awesome, Brandon!
DeleteI can speak from a parent's perspective: sure, I worry for my kid, but what I want most for him is that he live a happy life. A big paycheck doesn't equate happiness. A "steady job" doesn't equate happiness.
ReplyDeleteALSO - getting a degree in accounting, medicine, law, whatevs, does not guarantee steady, lucrative employment. No degree can. Wake up, Baby Boomers: nothing is secure, not for anyone, not in any profession. The folks who stand to succeed in this world are the adaptable, open-minded, and resourceful ones who aren't afraid to put a bit of hustle in their bustles and take calculated risks to achieve their goals.
My Kid, who's just completed his first year of college, wants to make movies - rock on, Kid. Chase after/take advantage of all opportunities in your field, work hard, build up some savings, don't take on too much debt, and don't neglect getting health insurance. The kind of work you want to do requires a lot of short-term gigs to work your way up the ladder? Cool, you can crash with me a few years until you reach that top rung.
That's what love is and that's what love does. It doesn't blackmail one's child to study a particular major in exchange for payment of college expenses for the gratification of one's own ego.
Some Dark Romantic
Hmmm...I guess I have strong feelings on the subject. Does it show? ;-)
DeleteLOL. This was great, Mina! I thoroughly enjoyed reading this. It's awesome your kid wants to make movies! I always say those things are not out of our reach, otherwise, we wouldn't have people out there who were directors or producers, or writers, even!
DeleteMy kids are still young yet, in grade school, so college is a long way off. And of course we talk about what they want to do for a job when they get older because it's so fun to hear what they say. But I've said before that they need to do something they love. When they get older, they'll probably learn the part about being able to take care/support yourself financially, because you can chase your dreams, but sometimes it takes hard work. I just want them to be happy though.
ReplyDelete